[Astarion looks back to him, eyes narrowed, his gaze assessing. The question carries more weight than he thought, then. It's Gale seeking a solution to his own problems, not just his desire to pry into the more private corners of Astarion's life.

It would be a perfect chance to forge a stronger connection, to be someone Gale could rely on, if only Astarion actually had any answers. But his honesty hasn't been met with revulsion or reticence. If anything, Gale's allowed him closer because of it. It may be worth the risk.]

In that regard we aren't the same. The infection has returned to me parts of my life that were lost for over two hundred years. Sunlight, running water, seeing a world that isn't cloaked in darkness.

Before this adventure of ours, I didn't have much of a choice as to how to manage the pain my transformation caused. Cazador controlled me. I could only seek solace in the fleeting moments where I had power of my own. When his compulsions and perversions were focused elsewhere.

I have lost everything of who I was before becoming his. It still hurts.